ionlyliveforyou_07's Xanga

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Tue, 22 Nov 2005 20:14:25 GMT

HEY i GOTS A NEW XANGA SITE. I MESSED UP MY OLD ONE

ITS :makemebelieveinyou_07

subscribe to me plzzzzz

ALICIA

Monday, November 21, 2005

Mon, 21 Nov 2005 22:32:35 GMT

Nobody gonna love me better, I must stick wit u forever! Nobody gonna take me higher, I must stick wit u! You know how to appreciate me, I must stick wit u, my baby! Nobody ever made me feel this way, I must stick wit u*

Well damn today at school wasn't nothing fun, seriously. Well me and Hannah talked finally about this whole drama shit. Oh YEAH SARA, I AM SO ASHAMED of YOU

well yeah Me and @$&*%! are still not talking and I think that fucking hilerious lol. cause its fuckin BS DRAMA, seriously. I am not too worried about it. Cause she needs to grow the fuck up. Cause I haven't said shit to her and I dont need her little mouth running every 5 minutes about how I broke her and her ex boyfriend up.

Well right now. I am still thinking about JR!!!! HE does make me happy, but DEVIN is the BONUS. Right not just being torn into 2 pieces really really sucks ass. I dunno maybe Something will slap me in the FUCKIN face to make me believe that something is suppose to be right between me and someone.

TAKE MY QUIZZZZ

WOULD YOU...

[_] go out with me?
[_] give me your number?
[_] kiss me?
[_] let me kiss you?
[_] watch a movie with me?

[_] let me take you out to dinner?

[_] let me drive you somewhere yess
[_] cut some rug with me
[_] be my bf/gf?
[_] have a fling with me?
[_] let me buy you a drink?

[_] Sing car karaoke w/ me?

[_] sit in the doctors office with me because I didn't want to go alone?
[_] re-post this for me to answer your questions?
[_] give me a piggyback ride?

[_] Come pick me up at 3 am because my car ran out of gas in the middle of nowhere yeah
[_] lick my cheek?
[_] listen to natalie with me?
[_] dance with me?
[_] let me make you breakfast?

[_] help me with homework?
[_] tickle me to death?

[_] let me tickle you?
[_] stick up for me if i was being put down?
[_] say yes if i asked you out?
[_] let me wear your pants?

[_] borrow a pair of my underwear if yours for some reason got ruined
[_] let me borrow your underwear if for some reason mine got ruined?
[_] instant message me?
[_] greet me in public?

[_] hang out with me?
[_] bring me around your friends?

DO U????
[_] think im cute?

[_] think im hot?
[_] want to kiss me?

[_] want to cuddle wit me?

[_] want to hook up with me?

ARE WE...
[_] aquintences?

[_] friends?

[_] in a relationship?

[_] gonna have kid?

AM i...
[_] smart?
[_] cute?
[_] funny?
[_] cool?
[_] loveable?
[_] adorable?
[_] compassionate?
[_] annoying?
[_] great to be with?
[_] attractive
[_] mean?
[_] odd?

HAVE Y0U EVER...
[_] thought about me?
[_] thought there might be an "us"?
[_] thought about hookin up with me?
[_] found yourself wanting a kiss from me?
[_] wished i were there?
[_] had a crush on me?
[_] idolized me?
[_] wanted my number
[_] had a dream about me?
[_] been distracted by me?

ARE Y0U...
[_] done with this survey?
[_] happy you know me?
[_] mad at me?
[_] thinkin bout me?
[_] going to repost this so that i will return the favor?

well yeah that is it for now

Loves my ppl

alicia

Sunday, November 20, 2005

Sun, 20 Nov 2005 05:34:10 GMT

Love is so freakin blind sometimes. I let somebody walk into my life and someone walk out of my life. I don't know which is worse YET, BUT i dunno just the world is spinning. friday was a great night and saturday sucked balls but I still had my amanda here.

Well in good new JR is stayin in town to talk to me and work some things out with each other. I dunno just when I still get around him I get that butterfly feeling. Like that chemistry is still there, but I know that I working on a good relationship with Devin, He is a really really nice guy and all, but sometimes I wonder if I am giving him the short end of the stick. hopefully jr and I try to figure this damn thing out

update::::::

I think I just threw someone out of my life, cause he was tryin to accuse me of everything. When he was just in the wrong as anyone else. I dunno. Maybe things will change, but yeah I think seriously. I really like Devin and Devin is really awesome to be around and gives me what I want. I dunno he makes me smile and I haven't smiled in a long time. I dunno just makes me laugh all the time.

I was sitting down one day (tuesday) and I realise that JR has no love for me anymore. I dunno just he fights me all the time. I miss him though, but I can't make things right, just not yet. Cause he and I are not the same ppl we were a long time ago. but that doesn't mean I do not love him, seriously. He is a great person. I hope he realises some things

Lovely's Layouts
i want a boy that i can be myself around.. that i can goof off in front of;; that i can ask stupid questions and not be laughed at,i want a boy who would drive out of his way to get me, and when we don`t even leave together, he wouldnt care because he at least got to see me. i want a boy that i couldnt get mad at,that i couldn`t even pretend i was mad at because he would make me smile everytime. i want a boy that would be there for me no matter what.But i had a boy that i could be my total, ditzy self in front of and not be afraid of what he thought. i had a boy that would drive on freaking e m p t y to be with me. i had a boy & i couldn`t get mad at him. not once. i couldn`t even pretend, because, he would look at me and i`d fall for him all over. i had a boy that was there for me.. anytime. now i miss that boy with all there is left. there won`t be another boy like him. that would just want to hang out with me everyday. i miss that boy that was impossible to be mad at. whose smile would keep me wanting more. i am in love with this boy. Even though I meant him not to long ago!

alicia bear

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Thu, 17 Nov 2005 20:40:46 GMT

GUESS WHAT EVERYONE

DANIELLE HAD HER BABY!!!!!

For all my LADIES

Guess what yall. I am so excited. I love my best friends in the whole wide world. Shit things are starting to turn around for me. I love yall peeps who has been there for me through everything.

Oh yeah forget JR, he can kiss my little mexican ass for all I care, cause yeah he says he loves me one min and the nexts he calling me a bitch, what the fuck?

I learned something new today!!!

ALWAYS REMEBER WHO UR FRIENDS ARE AND WHO YOUR ARE REPRESENTING, and THAT IS SO FREAKIN TRUE!!!!

Well to all my FELLOWS

I loves yall and thanks to my good friends (u know who u are) I am gonna go to a bomb fire tomorrow night and hang out with all my girls and guy friends and get the PARTY STARTED AND I WILL HAVE PICTURES FROM THAT !!!! LOL

ALEX IS THE BEST!!!!

LOVES YA

alicia bear

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Wed, 16 Nov 2005 21:30:23 GMT

ITS PARTY TIME!!

Kristen Kappel is my HERO

SARAH HESKET (OPPS) lol I spelled it wrong, IS MY PARTNER IN CRIME!!!

CHEERLEADERS RULE THE SCHOOL AND THE BOY FOOTBALL PLAYERS SUCK LOL NOT

I think I found someone that will actually freakin be the one I need to help me through everything. He gives me so much freakin comfort. He is sweet with everything that he does for me. I dunno just He makes me smile like none other. I dunno I think I am falling in love but its too soon. cause I just left JR and I know I miss him but I dunno just I don't want to be apart of that game anymore. He makes me cry everytime I think of him. Then on top of that. I have so many things going on with my life. I might be loosing my mind now. I wish things would be different seriously. I want my life back and the things I need in life back, that will never happen though

someone once told "love comes in every color, shape or size, but that person will always be there for you when u need him most

alicia

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Tue, 15 Nov 2005 20:40:11 GMT

want a boy that i can be myself around.. that i can goof off in front of;; that i can ask stupid questions and not be laughed at, but with.. i want a boy who would drive out of his way to get me, and when we don`t even leave together, he wouldnt care because he at least got to see me. i want a boy that i couldnt get mad at;; that i couldn`t even pretend i was mad at because he would make me smile everytime. i want a boy that would be there for me no matter what. && i had a boy that i could be my total, ditzy self in front of and not be afraid of what he thought. i had a boy that would drive on freaking e m p t y to be with me. i had a boy & i couldn`t get mad at him. not once. i couldn`t even pretend, because, he would look at me and i`d fall for him all over. i had a boy that was there for me.. anytime. now i miss that boy with all there is left. there won`t be another boy like him. that won`t care whether or not i shoulda been a blonde. that would just want to hang out with me everyday. i miss that boy that was impossible to be mad at. whose smile would keep me wanting more. i am in love with this boy.

How Could I?

When I first met you,
I thought I loved you,
but how could I have known that,
if I didn't know much about you.
When you kissed me,
I thought it was real,
but how could I have known that,
if I don't know what real feels like.
You told me you wanted to go out with me,
that you were going to break up with your girlfriend,
but how could I have known that was true,
if I didn't trust you.
How can I know if what I feel for you
is love or hate,
if I don't even know the time nor day.
How can I say that I love you,
If I'm not sure I know
what Love is.

Well today is just a normal day. Well I think its finally hitting me that me and JR are no more. Well I can't really complain. I really do like Devin and he is so awesome to be around. I dunno I am gonna just sit and wait on what is gonna happen with me and him. Well the highest thing that is there. Is that me and him are dating now. I am tryin my waters. I hope me and him do make it out okay. I just don't want me thinking about JR get in the way. Cause HE was my real true love and we had so much history involved with me and him. So to know that me and him are now no longer but we are just friends makes things alot easier.

well in good news. I am starting to get my life on track

alicia

Sunday, November 13, 2005

Sun, 13 Nov 2005 17:19:39 GMT

I dunno just the world is spinning. I went on my first true date yesterday and had a blast with him. It was wonderful. We had a great time with each other. Well just the life has been differnt. I learning from my mistakes everyday now. I am growing up and realising I don't have much longer till I graduate and I am already screwing most of my life up and I haven't even really been out into the real world. I know I scared my family when I just stopped and didn't care anymore. I miss my family though and I miss hanging around my friends and having something to do and I really do miss working. Cause that was a big part of what I was doing to keep myself busy but who really knows now.

Right now my biggest issue is getting my life straight and leaving people that hurt and distroyed my life and Then letting people help with my life and Remeber what I was really in love with.

I do want to thank people for help me with things and getting my life together

alicia

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Thu, 10 Nov 2005 20:35:43 GMT

Gosh I am back home with my mother again. Things are a little wierd but I am slowly getting use to it. I am so excited though. I gets to see everything changing again. but it is all worth it. I dunno my world was shot to fuckin hell after the other night. I love yall but yeah guess what me and JR are not together anymore this next sunday would have been 6 months but oh well. ME and this guy name DEVIN are talking and he is so freakin nice.

Well I thought I would summerize what happen this past 1 month and maybe 3 weeks now. I ran away from somthing I do not know. I just left and didn't even turn back. Not scared of anything till I got that freakin phone call scared me to death and to here me say mommy I am not coming home, I hate you and I never want to see you. That was scary. Living with my dad is like putting needle through out my body and haften to here stupid things and traveling from one home to another is scary too. Then having to put up with people saying shit that you thought they said is not right, but they didn't and tryin to tell that person ur sorry and wish that you would have said that. I dunno then you get the crazy boyfriend that you thought was perfect so you kept putting up with the problems and then you realise that he is just not what is right. He is was perfect don't get me wrong but just wasn't right. So you split from him and give that up. Then now your back to just you and then you remeber a guy you met almost 3 weeks earlier and he turns out too be the nices person around and just the most gentle person to be around and turns your life around and then you get 3 really great people in ur life that give you the LORD and gives you HOPE

thank you Kristen, David A., and David H.

Kristen: thank you for being there when I really need you the most and being my sister.

David A. : thanks for all the invites you give me to and on day I will be there

David H,:THANK YOU for the laughter you give me and comfort and strength

alicia

Saturday, October 29, 2005

Sat, 29 Oct 2005 13:13:11 GMT

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Wed, 26 Oct 2005 01:47:05 GMT

Hey everyone time for one my great updates. I love yall so much and I miss everyone that I still love. I am so excited I gets to start playing my instrument AGAIN!!!

Watch PEOPLE!!

Well I talk to JR while I was at the hospital with my dad. I haven't talk or seen him since like SATURDAY!! I miss him so much. Well Yeah I can't wait to tell him something though. I gets to go to Work by At least next tuesday. So I AM EXCITED!!! I ready to have a new job. Oh yeah one my friends here is gonna talk to her boss and try to get me a job at SONICS lol. I will be right back to finish my update. LOL BACK I had to put dishes up with my dad from the dish washer. I am loving living up here. JUST SO MUCH fun. School is so great let me tell ya. I get to stay out of trouble. NOT really. Actually just alot of DRAMA that is so freakin retarded but I am getting over it. I just think things are crazy right now. I love my UNCLE girlfriend (EMMA) she is so awesome I get along with her so much. She has a son name MAISON. HE is funn to play with, when I am at home he keeps me entertain. Which is really good. I am keeping myself busy and not too much of troubleness. I miss my Kristen though. Hopefully I get to see her graduate this year. Ever since I met her she has been so freakin awesome. I dunno how to put it. She keeps me out of trouble and makes sure I am okay. "Hey kristen, My friend Amanda Reed is keeping me in Line and oh yeah let me tell CHEMISTRY SUCKS with out you and oh yeah I am freakin lost out of my mind in that class"

Well I wish I could see my JR he makes me happy and makes me real again

well love everyone I care about

alicia